Slang Editorial :: Never Underestimate The Value Of A Holla'

Wednesday, April 29, 2009
On My Continuingly Strange Relationship With Physical Possessions

Two delightfully deprarious Beaumont Life news bits to share from yesterday:

1) So after last week having a third light stolen off my bike (my fault, sure, but yeah awesome!!!), I had the real cake last night when, after getting to my bike at 7:40pm, I noticed that someone had stolen my motherfucking SEAT POST CLAMP. What is a seat post clamp even, you ask? Well it's this and the image above.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thankfully they hadn't actually stolen my seat since I am now in the habit of bringing both that and the front wheel into my office, but it never even occurred to me that someone might consider stealing a seemingly innocent $6 item like a seatpost clamp. Hell, I didn't even realize that mine could be removed from the bike! But beyond the general annoyingness of having to shell out $6 more on bike products, what it also meant was that I had to make yet ANOTHER trip from 50 St & 6 Av to 12 St & Av C to get to the only bike shop I know of open at 7:55pm on a weeknight, Continuum Cycles [they are awesome, FYI. I bought my bike there are you should love them if you can]. Thankfully I squeaked in as they were literally locking the door to the shop and got the requisite clamp so I could do a little sitting down on the rest of my journey. This shit is just getting to be straight fucking deprarious. If a bike is not safe in midtown Manhattan during a weekday in broad daylight, where the fuck might it be safe? Ahh yes, in my office where I'm not allowed to store it.

But yeah, let's not forget about...

Our car, in better days

2) No joke, but I got a call from a police officer that, somehow, my mom's stolen car has been found and re-appeared in south Williamsburg sans stereo (have fun without the faceplate, fuckers).

I haven't seen the car yet, but apparently it's still in drivable shape and is being held by a tow company to be returned to the insurance company who are now its owners.

What the fuck, right? Life is fucking strange these days.

Labels: BEAUMONT, case studies, curiosities, deprarious, disappointment, FAIL, junkjunk, memories

posted by Nihilist Loves Hate, Hates Everything at 4/29/2009 11:38:00 AM 1 comments

1 Comments:

Illuminotec said...: Shit man that sucks. Have you ever thought about just bolting down every piece of your bike. That seems like the only way to avoid getting it stolen. Another interesting idea might be to create some kind of elaborate bear trap for a would be thief. If not bolts of bear traps maybe you should get in touch with these guys: http://www.cyberbond1.com/ and see if they have anything that could help.; 4/30/2009 12:29:00 AM